“We are the sum of our actions, and therefore our habits make all the difference” – Aristotle.
The new year is here, and for many people, that means an opportunity to change, begin a fresh slate, or accomplish something new. A new year’s resolution can be a fantastic opportunity to evaluate your current lifestyle and determine what needs to change to create a happier, more confident version of yourself. The problem is that many people go about pursuing resolutions in the wrong way.
According to estimate from John C. Norcross of the University of Scranton, less than 10% of new year’s resolutions are achieved. Why? Because people focus on short-term goals rather than smart, long-term habits.
Think back to all the resolutions that you’ve made across the years. The chances are that they had something to do with your habitual behaviours, like smoking, eating healthier, exercising more, or spending more time “unplugged.” Our habits are a result of the way that we’ve conditioned ourselves to respond to certain stimuli, and they can seem difficult to overcome. However, the truth is that changing your habits can actually be much easier than accomplishing a “new year’s resolution.”
To change your habits, all you need to do is replace a bad behaviour with a good one. You’ve already created hundreds of habits that you may not be aware of in your day-to-day life.
So, how do you use the science of habits to improve your world?
How to Alter Your Habits: Know Your Why
The word “Resolution” comes from the Latin Resolutionem, which translates to the concept of “reducing” ideas to their simplest form. With that in mind, we start to see that if we want to make significant changes in our lives, we can’t expect to accomplish incredible things overnight. Instead, the most successful habit-changing behaviours occur when we break down the information, we have available to us and identify the specific changes we want to make. This means:
- Understanding your existing habits and why you want to change
- Starting small and paving the way for success
- Planning for new routines
- Getting support from the right people
- Knowing how to cope with failure
- Believing in yourself and having fun
Let’s start with the basics – figuring out your “why.”
Ultimately, it’s difficult to make a significant change to your behaviour and lifestyle if you can’t understand why you’re doing it. When the going gets tough and you’re tempted to give up, your “why” will help you to remember why you need to keep pushing forward.
Start by looking at the habits in your life that, when changed, will make a significant impact on your quality of living, then define why each changed habit will benefit you. For instance:
- I want to lose weight so that I have more confidence and feel healthier
- I want to drink less alcohol so that I can achieve a better mental state
- I want to give up smoking, so I can live longer and watch my children grow
Once you know which habits you can benefit from changing, and “why” you want to change those habits, start by picking the one thing that matters most to you right now. As tempting as it can be to set multiple goals for yourself, addressing one issue at a time will improve your chances of success.
Changing Your Life Starts with One Small Step
Importantly, when you’re looking for ways to change, it’s crucial that you don’t get caught up trying to do too much too fast. People regularly end up getting caught up by their new year’s resolutions because they set goals that are too vague and overwhelming. For instance, telling yourself that you’re going to “do more exercise” isn’t a small feat.
To set and maintain a new habit, start by looking for a small and precise issue that you want to change. For instance, tell yourself that you’re going to go for a walk for ten minutes every other day, or that you’ll start running for an hour once a week. These small but focused actions allow you to concentrate on generating real results.
Remember, although it’s a good idea to be ambitious and challenge yourself when you’re trying to change, keep things relatively simple, to begin with. Forming new habits means establishing conditioned responses to things, which means that you need to practice the new behaviour as regularly as possible before it can begin to occur on its own. The easier it is to stick to your new routine, the less trouble you’ll have when you’re transforming your life.
Additionally, look for ways to keep yourself motivated as you go. There are two ways that you can do this. Some people remind themselves of the negative issues that may arise if they don’t change their habits. For instance, if you continue to smoke, you could end up getting life-threatening diseases that prevent you from living a long and happy life with your family. However, focusing on pain as a motivator can be overwhelming to some. Instead, you may find that it’s easier to concentrate on the positive results of changing your habits. For instance, people who stop smoking generally have more energy, greater control over their emotions and better endurance.
To make your path to success seem smaller, try giving yourself a three-month timeline for change, where you can look back, review your progress, and determine where you need to go next. Within 3 months your actions, habits, and priorities may have begun to change, which means that it could be time to adjust your strategy.
Routines are Key When Forming Habits
One of the many reasons why people struggle with their new year’s resolutions is that they simply try to eliminate a behaviour completely. However, the best way to reduce a harmful habit is generally to replace it with a better one. For instance, if every time you feel stressed at work you get yourself a drink of alcohol when you return home, then it will be difficult to continually convince yourself to do nothing instead.
However, if you decide that you’re going to go for a jog when you feel stressed, practice some meditation, or have a mug of green tea instead, then you give your mind something else to focus on when it’s searching for a source of stress relief.
Crucially, you might find that it takes a while to find a new routine to replace your old one that gives you the same level of “reward” or satisfaction you were getting with your past behaviours. If you’re still tempted to drink something when switching your routine to running, for instance, you might add a healthy smoothie or juice into your routine too.
Don’t Try to Go It Alone
When the new year begins, many of the people around you will be attempting to accomplish their own set of goals and adjust their personal habits. However, that doesn’t mean that they won’t be willing to act as part of your support network too. The more people you have around you to hold you accountable for your actions and remind you of what you’re trying to achieve, the better off you’ll be.
Start by dividing your environments into different social circles, including things like gym sessions, work colleagues, friends, family and so on. Once you’ve found your social groups, communicate the habit that you’re trying to change to them, and let them know if there’s any way that they can help. For instance, if you’re trying to cut down on unhealthy food, you might be able to ask your family to avoid keeping too much of it around the house or ask your boss if you can start taking healthier snacks to work.
By letting people know what you need to adjust your habits, you’re reducing your risk of falling off the wagon and ensuring that people understand that you’re attempting to spark a change in your life. Though it is possible to change your habits, adjusting your behaviour isn’t always easy. The more people that you have supporting you, the more successful you become. What’s more, the more public you are with your goals, the less likely you are to simply give up on them.
How to Get Back Up When You Fall Off the Wagon
One thing you need to remember when you’re setting new habits this year is that things won’t always go according to plan. Once you’ve ingrained your habits into your routine, then they’ll reside in the ancient part of your brain that allows them to become a natural part of your behaviour. However, until then, there’s always a possibility that you might revert to old habits from time to time.
Usually, people end up “falling off the wagon” when they’re tired, overwhelmed or stressed, then they regret their actions when they can think more clearly. During these periods, it’s crucial to learn from your mistakes and remind yourself that just because you’ve made a mistake, doesn’t necessarily mean that you need to give up on your goals entirely.
Everyone makes a little mistake from time to time and reminding yourself of the “why” you chose when deciding to alter your habits will help to get you back on track. Rather than beating yourself up for every failure, use these instances as opportunities to better understand your triggers and the things that might lead to problems for you in the future. That way, you can reduce your chances of further issues down the road.
Above all else, whether you encounter failures or not, it’s crucial to continue believing in yourself and what you can accomplish. Your behaviours are yours to change, and there’s nothing stopping you from altering your habits – all you need to do is keep working at it. If you believe you can change, then you will.
Make 2019 The Year to Change Your Habits
Ultimately, if you decide that you want this year to be the time that you invest in real and lasting change, the best thing you can do is focus on adjusting your habits, rather than attempting to achieve vague, or unrealistic goals. The problem with goals is that we set them as markers somewhere in the future which can be reached or ignored. Even if you do reach your goals, often they won’t lead to any significant change. People frequently aim to lose weight, but because they haven’t focused on changing their eating or exercising habits for the long term, the weight that they do lose ends up coming back after they’ve reached their goal.
Rather than setting a course for a pre-destined finish line this year, think about how you can become a different and happier person on a permanent basis. Don’t just become an alternative version of yourself during the time that you want to reach your goal, look at how you can adjust your behaviour to be that person all the time.
Habits are neither temporary nor short term – unless you want them to be. The process of habit-forming is deliberate, slow, and perfect for creating sustainable and genuine long-term change. However, if you want to adjust your habits, then you need to remember that it’s going to take time, focus, and plenty of self-belief. When you get down to the heart of the issues that are holding you back, and the behaviours that you need to adapt to generate real transformation, you can begin to build the foundations that you need for success in the future. Eventually, those foundations will become a hard-wired part of your identity, helping you to cope and perform better in all manner of situations.
A new year means a new opportunity to reinvent yourself and your life – don’t make your quest for happiness and success a temporary fix. Start identifying the changes that you want to make and the whys that live behind them, then adapt your habit list to follow. It’s time to make this year, your year!
